The Magnificent Plaid Gentleman
Strolling down the street of any metropolitan American street, and you will undoubtedly see men in suits. Some will look dapper, others, desperate. Most of these men will be wearing them because it is required of them. A few will be the gentlemen who take pride in their dress and will inspire your mind, giving you a desire to sharpen yourself up a bit. They are wearing the uniform of the day, the uniform of men since the Milias of old. But there is one man on this street that is different. He’s not so much a man as he is a beacon, a lighthouse in a foggy harbor of black and blue; of brown and olive and grey. He is the magnificent bastard wearing plaid.
“Where is he from?” you may ask yourself. London? New York? Milan? Does he have an accent? Unbeknownst to you, you’re almost neighbors. You are one click on “People You May Know” away, from friending him. Imagine now, as interested you are in his story at this moment, how intrigued the women on the street are with this hero of sartorial swagger. Society has taught us over and over again, the only way to make your statement is to stand out. From Lennon’s hair and the scarves of Jimmy Hendrix to Jay-Z’s mink and Thom Browne’s short trousers, rebellion and contrarianism are the weapons of the new movement. In a never-ending stream of flat, empty canvases of today’s “well-dressed”, plaid is the rebellion of the modern gentleman.
The man in plaid knows what most don’t. He knows that plaid was created by the Scots in defiance of the English rule. They created tartans to disnguish their clans from the pasty Brits with their tea and cucumber finger sandwiches. The “Feck Ye!” scream of their tartan kilts stuck in the craw of the English Royalty enough that it was banned aer the Scosh Rebellion. That’s right, gents; plaid was NWA, Public Enemy and the Sex Pistols before the world even knew what a record was. This man geng the aenon of every eye in the street knows that Eddie Vedder and his plaid buon downs started the Grunge Revoluon that saved us from the 80’s. He knows this fully well, and is proud to carry on the tradion.
Great men in plaid are storied men, even legends. The Countess of Seafield created Glen Plaid as the uniform for her Gamekeepers, who patrolled her land to keep poachers at bay, and those men wore it so well that the paern became known world-wide by tailors and has been draped over the shoulders of such men as Churchill and Kennedy. The Duke of Windsor, when he was just the Prince of Wales, decided the Royal garb was much too dreary. He ordered his tailor to add one stripe of blue in each check of the glen plaid, and strode into sartorial history as the creator of Prince of Wales Plaid. These men held many different beliefs, but had at least one in common, that plaid is not to be feared, but cherished and honored.
Whether a simple windowpane, with large squares of subdued stripes, a gingham paern of small white and colored checks or the plaids and tartans discussed here, embrace it, gentlemen. Slide on a blue and white gingham buon down under a glen plaid suit, knowing that as long as the check paers are of a different scale, you’re safe from being mistaken for Pee-Wee Herman and Rodney Dangerfield. Instead, you’ll be compared to the greats like Gary Cooper, Cary Grant and Fred Astaire. Pair a glen plaid suit, light blue socks, a stark white buon down and a navy blue e, and you’ll be the mysterious man on the street. Strut the streets like a peacock, and noce the wonder in everyone’s eyes as you pass. Can you hear it in the minds of your new admirers? “Is he from Paris? Geneva? No one from around here dresses that well.”
You are wearing clothing with a proud heritage of rebellion and royalty now. You are now the beacon; warning the others of the dangers they face as they stray dangerously close to the cliffs of despair known as olive and khaki. You now own the street, and the gaze of everyone inhabing it. You are the magnificent gentleman in plaid now, and as you stride past one of the less fortunate, you glance over, and with a smirk on your face, say “That sure is a nice brown suit.”
Modern Guidelines for Golf Course Style
Article for GolfWRX // 10/13/2017
Rules. Before we’re even old enough to talk, our lives begin to revolve around rules. Don’t pick your nose. Don’t put that in your mouth (Plenty of situations where that’s a good rule even when you’re 40). Bedtime. Chores. No Cinemax after 10:00. The thing about rules is that most of them are created to keep us from having any fun. That’s just how life is. When we get older, we have to worry about more rules; And then we start playing golf. The only game known to man that requires a 581 page rule book (Plus an appendix). We already have enough rules to follow. So when I sat down to write this, I decided on guidelines instead. Guidelines are much easier to swallow than rules. So, these are not strict “Must do’s”, just a collection of insights that can help you not look like a fool out there.
In 1991, Eddie Vedder and Pearl Jam convinced every man in America that it was cool to not care how you looked, and since then, we’ve been treated to oversized flannels, baggy cargo pants and men just dressing like lazy slobs in general. Remember Tiger’s huge shirts and trousers that looked like parachute pants in the 90’s? Or the U.S. Ryder Cup Team’s shirts at Brookline that looked like Norman Rockwell had a few too many juleps and hurled on them? Ugh. Fortunately there’s been a movement since around 2007 and men are starting to care again, and I love it. For too long we had few viable options when it came to clothes for the course. Over the last few years, a wave of new companies has come to fix that. Linksoul (https://linksoul.com/), Travis Mathew (www.travismathew.com), Devereux (www.dvrxthreads) and William Murray (www.williammurraygolf.com) have become household names. But even the more established companies are stepping up their game, Puma (www.cobragolf.com/pumagolf/) and Ralph Lauren (www.ralphlauren.com/brands-golf-men) being two of the most notable. Some lesser known but great lines are Q.E.D. (https://qedstyle.com/) and Rool Golf (www.roolgolf.com), and you can never, EVER go wrong with anything from Arnold Palmer Apparel (www.arnoldpalmerapparel.com). Plenty of companies are out there offering modern options for you to look great, so there’s no reason to hit the course looking like you don’t belong there, or looking like you don’t respect where you are or the game you’re playing. Golf doesn’t need to be a stuffy dinner party, but it also doesn’t need to look like a NASCAR tailgate party, either. Follow these guidelines, and you’ll never be accused of being ready for either:
1- Fit is (The) King- This should be common sense, but a lot of guys overlook it. The finest shirt in the world will look like absolute garbage on you if it doesn’t fit correctly. Look at the tag, and look for the terms “Athletic Fit”, “Slim Fit” or “Tailored Fit”. These cuts won’t be boxy or “blousey” like Tiger’s shirts from the 90s. And they’ll make you look slimmer. Check the sleeves and make sure they don’t pass below your elbows. Just below the bicep is perfect. In shorts, the length is paramount. No disrespect to Nike, but their shorts belong in a skate park more than on the course. To be honest, most companies make their shorts too long. Check out Original Penguin (www.originalpenguin.com/clothing/shorts/) for examples of how shorts should fit a grown man, ending just above the knee.
2- Forget about “Tech Fibers”- The biggest problem with the shiny, moisture-wicking performance fibers designed for athletic performance is exactly that. They aren’t designed for anything else. As soon as you step off the course, they look out of place. You can’t toss a cardigan on or a blazer and head to the bar for cocktails and trash talk wearing one; It’s just wrong. Choose something with natural fibers, something that’s actually woven. There’s nothing wrong with a little tech, but if it can’t go from the course to the lounge then to dinner, it doesn’t need to be in your closet.
3- Respect your feet- Those clunky, chunky, cheap golf shoes you found in the clearance section? That’s disrespect in the highest order. The first things someone notices about a man is his watch and his shoes. They don’t need to be Footjoy Icons (Even though it’s a fantastic choice), but there are plenty of high quality options. Adidas (http://www.adidas.com/us/golf) is killing it with old school sneaker styles. And please, PLEASE throw your sandal-spikes in the trash immediately. It’s worse than wearing Crocs if you aren’t a chef. If you really want to pull of the casual look with some character, check out Canoos (https://www.canoos.com/). Their boat shoes and canvas sneakers are the coolest thing around right now.
4- Accessories, But at Your Own Risk- The days of big, gawdy belt buckles are over. Get something nice and slim, or even something with a check or stripe on it. Even the white belt at this point is getting a little blah. Andre 300 said that every man should have one thing in his wardrobe that “blings”. Not four, just one. That’s a fantastic guideline. Whether it’s your watch, your socks, your belt, or a bracelet, let one thing you wear pop from everything else. As for sunglasses, unless you’re a track star, a Formula 1 driver, or Henrik Stenson, you don’t need the ultra techy wrap-around sport shades. Stick to something cool. Something smooth. A pair of Persols (www.persol.com) should do nicely, but there are plenty of cheaper options like something Steve McQueen would’ve worn on the course. Actually, just use Steve McQueen every time you ask “Should I wear this?” And you’ll be just fine.
5- White Pants (When do we stop?)- I have a few pair of white trousers. You have to have a couple because they get dirty in a hurry. And I love wearing them and love that I see a ton of Tour guys wearing them. They’re sharp as hell. But, there really does come a point in the season when it’s not okay to wear white pants. Fall is for darker colors, earthy tones and thicker fabrics. It’s rain pant weather. Fall isn’t for the white pants you wore when playing in San Diego a few months ago. The Labor Day rule no longer applies, but it has been expanded. As a general guideline, once the MLB Playoffs start, put the white pants away and let them sit until spring.
6- Okay, maybe a couple Rules- I can’t list these as merely guidelines. It’s 2017, and certain things just should not be a part of your wardrobe, and to be honest, they never should have been in the first place:
– Jean Shorts- Burn them. Burn. Every. Single. Pair. Now.
– Ditch the Pleats- Are you smuggling two pigeons in your pants? No, you’re not.
– Long white or black socks with shorts- Either go for something like Stance socks (www.stance.com) or stick with no-shows or ankle socks. If you’re going to show some sock game, better make sure it’s on fleek.
– Dress Code Disrespect- There are plenty of courses I play that allow t-shirts, and I love playing in a t-shirt and shorts. But if a course has a dress code, just please respect it. Don’t be the dick that shows up in jeans and then tries to get away with it by claiming he didn’t know. Don’t be that guy. Most of us have office jobs or jobs that require wearing a uniform. For many of us, the golf course is one of the remaining outlets for us to express our individual style. So, have fun with it, and enjoy it. It’s okay to put some thought into what you wear to the course guys. Don’t let Grunge win.
Bryan Metzler GolfWRX, 10/13/2017 | bryan@theclaretclub.com
Why Your Clubs are Possibly (Probably) Wrong for You
Full disclosure, I’ve never written about golf equipment, instruction or any technical aspect of this glorious (read: torturous) game. My wheelhouse is a little more, should we say, old school…
Bryan Metzler, Submission to GolfWrx.com, July 5, 2017